Fatima Kiani
“Dear London,
I knocked your door during the storm
And you embraced me like my mom
Bare-soul and empty-hearted, I joined your parade like them all
Amongst them I felt so small, hence started to raise my walls
You call us all your foster child
Making us brave, turning us wild
Years have passed by, see I am an adult
And our love story became a bit of a cult
Some days you caressed my scars
Others, I found myself alone at wars
It dawned upon that day
I was deceived, you weren’t here to stay
I don’t feel part of your family no more
Who failed who, the question stays sore
I retire now, playing your lover
It’s a vain attempt, winning you over
You lured us all in your candy home
But I am Gretel, will escape through the dome
I am here now standing at bay
My surname is Londoner
let it stay that way”
London | 01.18.20
Fatima Kiani
Jordan Dixon
“Tangled myself in the social web to give a helping hand to those caught up.”
London | 04.12.21
Jordan Dixon
Wumi Olaosebikan
“I’m feeling pretty excited…I’m so used to being pulled left, right and centre all over London. This calamity kinda forces me to sit in and kinda focus inwards…as in focus on actually clearing my space properly for once… I’m gonna make art and give myself time to think, plan, pray and make more art!”
London | 03.27.20
Wumi Olaosebikan
Shantella Miller
“Stay safe and sane.”
London | 04.01.20
Shantella Miller
Tijana Tamburic
“Exhausted.”
London | 04.18.20
Tijana Tamburic
Ewa Effiom
"Isolation has been interesting, I feel as if I’ve learnt a lot about myself, what I need, and what I don’t. I feel as though I should hate this more than I do. I’ve not drank some wanky wine in a bar with friends over inconsequential conversations in weeks, I haven’t been to an exhibition and argued about art in weeks, I haven’t been to the cinema or the theatre in weeks, but more importantly, I haven’t been running between events I don’t really care about for weeks. So, swings and roundabouts... I’m sorry. When you asked us to say how we felt, ambivalence is probably not what you were hoping for.”
London | 05.20.20
Ewa Effiom
Jacob Petterson
“Currently sat outside my apartment as the firefighters deal with the alarm, but it’s beautiful out and I’m feeling calm.”
Newport | 04.11.20
Jacob Patterson
Laurie Nouchka
“Truthfully, I feel really grateful for this time - grateful for my practice to bring me back into a state of equilibrium, and grateful to be of service and support people. That’s not to say that at the beginning there wasn’t anxiety, but my breathing practice brought me back. I feel really proud of each and every one of us, in all the ways that we have been affected, from loss to self discovery. I’m proud of us all for slowly coming out of the situation. I think everyone should feel really proud of themselves.”
London | 05.25.20
Laurie Nouchka
Hirah Ahmed
“I’m sad, tired, exhausted, anxious. I have a dressing on my face because of damage from wearing my PPE. I don’t know how much longer we can last - we are already burnt out, everyone feels like this. I cry a lot. I feel sad for my patients and my patients' families. I feel sad for my colleagues. I miss my family but can’t see them. I can’t eat much and barely sleep. Let’s hope and pray it gets better soon.”
London | 04.22.20
Hirah Ahmed
Jey
"I’m resigned to the fact that I might succumb to the virus. But until then, it is my mandate to do the best I can to save patients.
We are working 15/16 hour shifts. I feel a decision fatigue that I’m aware of. I know when I’m at home I have to switch off and get some sleep. I have a duty to patients and their families to present the best of myself so I can give them the best standard of care.
When I get home, I know life has gone on for my wife and children. When my wife asks how I’m doing, I just say that I’m fine. I can’t crystallise into words or sentiments what has just happened during my shift, nor do I want to relive it. But when I’m home, I know the disease is still operating. It doesn’t stop because my shift ended.
There’s a whole group of volunteers and staff, where their primary role is nothing to do with intensive care. They are not supposed to be at the sharp end of this. But it’s been inspiring to see the way they have put themselves forward to help us, despite the dangers and risks involved. That provides me with strength. There are hundreds of people who have helped us. Without them, we wouldn’t be able to do a fraction of the work we’ve done. Little things, like people and local companies providing us with hot meals for lunch. It sounds like nothing, but when you’re exhausted, it’s essential. I just want to express my gratitude to all of them.
I’m very aware that there are hundreds of people working at the hospital looking to me for leadership. They each have a story, and it is my responsibility to make sure they don’t become the next casualty.
There is an inherent desire to go back and be alongside my colleagues to fight for our patients. There are groups of people, with God’s grace, who have some skills and knowledge that can fight this virus. And if you have the ability and energy to do that, then I sincerely believe you should be at the tip of the spear, taking this head on.”
London | 04.29.20
Jey
Johanna Frances
“I feel helpless and emotionally exhausted behind my smile. But I’ve found my solace in running; a way, even if just for a little while, to forget all of the bad in the world. One run in the morning, one in the evening, just like clockwork. I just wish I could keep running and never stop.”
London | 04.20.20
Johanna Frances
Georgie Arabella
"I have been facing so many of the threads tangled in to my fears of being alone. It brought back the depressing emotions of feeling lonely in a crowded room. This loneliness pandemic was around long before lockdown, now it's just more obvious. I have taken this as a blessing to nurture the connection with my own heart first and then outwards from there to my bed, the plants, the sky. I hope this will remind us to cherish every cuddle, to be grateful for every dance, and to find freedom in truly expressing ourselves and connecting with our brothers and sisters.”
Koh Phangan | 06.02.20
Georgie Arabella
Analise Sesay
“I feel suffocated by desire and injustice, and motivated by hope. I started a breath work practice and I’m using this time to get unstuck energetically. I’m working through all I was able to run and hide from before, I’m working for flow and lightness in the new world.”
New Orleans | 05.11.20
Analise Sesay
Ivy
"This is the first time in a long time I have felt free, but, in the midst of the lockdown, freedom is restricted.
I resigned from my job the week before the lockdown began. I planned to take a sabbatical to rest, reflect and plan my future.
My feelings fluctuate from feeling sad, lonely, exhausted, and then I remember the positive things, like being with my family who are all well and safe, all the front line workers worldwide doing their best to keep us all safe, and the never-ending love and guidance from God, then I feel happy again. I say a little prayer and I manage to do something productive and creative. It shall come to pass. 😊 ”
London | 05.28.20
Ivy
Saaj Raja
“Turning inward. Feeling connected amongst moments of uncertainty. Every breath is an opportunity. Endeavouring to tread in alignment.”
London | 04.14.20
Saaj Raja
Gavin Freeborn
"On a daily basis I contemplate and meditate on the great loss and danger so many people are suffering around the world. Personally, I feel grateful that the lockdown has provided me with space and time to ground myself further, exercise more freely, cycle more safely in London, and share my energy through teaching yoga and meditation to help others support themselves. I definitely feel a sense of loss, evolving into gratitude, hope, and a revolution through liberation and rebirth of myself, others and Mother Nature 🙏🏻🍀”
London | 05.22.20
Gavin Freeborn
Donna McDowell
"I thought about how I felt and sat with those feelings and just started to cry. My dad died just before lockdown. So this time has been a time of grief. Grieving him. Grieving the company of my family. Not seeing friends. The loss of so much I had worked so hard for professionally. Human touch. I'm training to be an Anglican priest and there can be a pressure for people of faith to always live in hope. But to be human is to feel, and to have faith is to feel connected to all of humanity, and so I give in to lament, as well as try to hold on to hope.”
05.22.2020
Donna McDowell
Raquib Ahasan
"I feel like I really need a haircut! I feel messy. Maybe it’s the hair, maybe it’s the effect of the pandemic.”
Leyton | 06.21.20
Raquib Ahasan
P.B
”My name is 🌱 and I live on a little farm in Finland with my girlfriend, another couple, 5 dogs, one cat and three pet sheep. We are what you might call a queer, artistic and alternative lifestyle-living bunch of rocker hippies! I’d like to tell you my experience during the Covid pandemic.
You have to know this first: All my adult life I have struggled with depression and trauma. I’m mostly a happy-go-lucky, outgoing, bubbly personality and many people don’t see this dark side of me. These last few years, I’ve found that the kindest thing for myself is to slow my life down considerably and spend more time on my own. On the farm, which we call 🌱, it’s possible. We have our own well, our own heating wood, a lovely sauna, our amazing pets and nature all around us. We don’t have a lot of money, but we have what we need and help each other out.
Before Covid, even though I’d simplified my life, I’d always felt anxiety watching the world move so fast. It seemed no one was stopping for even a minute to just watch and listen to what was happening around them and within us. Our species was destroying our planet, our beautiful fauna... and each other. I saw terrible things everywhere and the world just kept speeding up and never slowing down. Greed and capitalism everywhere.
When the pandemic started, first I was terrified. I took it seriously from the get go. I was really scared until we were all told to stay home. My ranch family and I stayed home for 13 weeks and I have to admit... it was bliss!
We are truly some of the luckiest people in the world to be isolated right here. I am so glad I had made the choice to learn to live with myself before this started. I was in a safe place, I was working SO hard on myself...I had just started therapy last summer, I was meditating and doing more art... and suddenly, I felt I was being rewarded with all this extra time to spend on my wellbeing, and everyone I knew finally had to slow down too. I’m in a limbo because this calm joy also brings me great guilt. I have dear friends all around the world whom I worry about. Personally, I haven’t felt this calm and focused in over 20 years. I feel like I have to hide that I’m finally doing well, after all the hard struggles with depression and social anxiety. Can I say it out loud, now that the world is in chaos? I cannot.
In Finland we have an old proverb: kel onni on, se onnen kätkeköön. It means: They who have happiness are wise to hide it. I never understood it before. I wish I could tell everyone I’m doing better. But how can I when everyone else is suffering?
The world is changing fast and I’ve been waiting so long for these changes. Although these are frightening times I am ready for a new, kinder world. I have been waiting my whole life for this. There is much work to do but I’m ready. For me, this pandemic has been the best time of my life. I am scared to say this when others suffer. I am so very lucky. Very lucky. Privileged, lucky, happy and guilty for finding peace in the midst of chaos.”
Finland | 07.02.20
P.B
Jade Brevett
”How am I feeling? I’m feeling absolutely bored to tears!”
London | 07.27.20
Jade Brevett
Stephanie Ressort
"Right now, I am feeling pretty great. In 2018, I found out I had cancer. I've been cancer free for 17 months now. I was rebuilding my life, work wise anyway, when Coronavirus happened. Which meant that, weirdly, I was emotionally equipped for it. I know how to live with the discomfort of uncertainty. I've taken the time to really look after myself and keep healing. From helping others, to meditating, I've prioritised doing things that nourish my sense of my wellbeing, and it has been really wonderful. I'm trying not to feel guilty about that.
Financially, things are difficult, but as a freelancer, at least that is a worry I am very familiar with. I feel strong in myself, and hopefully that will give me the fuel I need to continue to build my life, and the energy I need to help those around me (family, friends, community) who need me. The one thing I am so clear on now is that life is not a competition (a big revelation for someone who grew up under Thatcher), and that in order to truly thrive, we need to support and help those around us. Whatever that community might look like. I hope others leave lockdown with a similar outlook. That would create a powerful force for positive change.”
London | 05.22.20
Stephanie Ressort
Saadi Rahman
"I feel very content. Very good. I couldn’t say I felt like this five months ago or so, but better times are just around the corner."
London | 09.24.20
Saadi Rahman
Donya Taher
"Honestly, I am emotionally exhausted. I would award myself an Oscar for my role in pretending everything is okay. Lockdown has been tiring in many ways, I have had to face my demons and traumas, and the anxiety has been HIGH. Lockdown made me realise that I've always feared digging deep into my trauma. I've been on an emotional roller coaster - happy, sad, grateful, anxious and hurt - sometimes all in one day.
My healing journey feels like peeling an artichoke - once you've tenderly peeled the leaves, you'll find the heart.”
London | 06.01.20
Donya Taher
Rawlins, Breito, Joaquim and Lloyd
“This is a very busy time for us. We are cooking all day. But we’re very happy to be able to provide food for the hungry people living on the streets. It gives us a good feeling to know that we are helping.”
The Punjab in Covent Garden is the oldest North Indian restaurant in the UK. During lockdown the few remaining members of staff are making 2,500 meals a week to feed the homeless in central London. Rawlins, Breito, Joaquim and Lloyd are the kitchen staff at the Punjab.
The Punjab, Covent Garden | 06.18.20
Rawlins, Breito, Joaquim and Lloyd
Aarefa Tayabji
"On this day I wanted to dress up for the fun of it and send my pic to my family around the world. I'm really glad that with technology we can stay connected with people around the world. I'm really fortunate and happy that in quarantine I have family support with me.
But also behind that happy face I do stress that I don't have work right now and won't be good enough to get hired compared to others.”
Dubai | 06.14.20
Aarefa Tayabji
Janine Otto
"I’m feeling content and relaxed at home.”
Kent | 01.10.21
Janine Otto
Kehinde
“They’re killing us. They’re killing our sons. I am a mother - my boy and girl are young adults now. I am here for them. I don’t think I need a better reason than that.
I am concerned about the virus and being in a large crowd. I’ve taken all the precautions I can. But we have to be here. We’ve suffered 400 years of violence and oppression. Eventually, we have to take a stand and say that we will not suffer anymore.”
Parliament Square London | 06.10.20
Kehinde
Sandeep Johal
"It changes throughout the day- anything from feeling inspired or grief… calm or lost. I’m at an inflection point in life and I want to feel prepared. Right now, I feel a sense of calm acceptance.”
London | 05.22.20
Sandeep Johal
Lucy
“I’m a paediatric and adolescent research nurse specialist at UCLH, and I work in clinical trials with children. Just before lockdown was announced, I went for a drink with my friends. We were talking about how we would have to use our bikes to get to work now that public transport would be difficult. I walked around the corner and saw that my bike had been stolen. My friends were so outraged that they went on a twitter rampage, and loads of people got in touch, offering me their bikes, or offering to buy me one. Knowing how many people would be in the same position as me, we decided to set up Tour de Thanks as a way of helping NHS staff get bicycles to travel to work.
The response has been amazing. People are being so thoughtful and generous. The number of medical staff you can put at a lower risk by letting them cycle to work is huge. We’ve arranged at least 60 bikes for staff now, but we are still in need of more.
Any research that’s unrelated to Covid has been put on pause. All the children at my hospital have been moved to a different hospital, so I’ve been moved on to an adult Covid ward. It was a big change for me, as I’ve never had to do adult care before. I felt lots of anxiety, but I’ve actually had some of the best times of my career. I really enjoyed being back on the front line, doing that intimate patient care. Because families have not been able to be present, we have become everything for the patients we are looking after.
My housemates are not in the medical profession, so they were anxious to know I was on the Covid wards and could be bringing the virus home. They thought about moving away. That made me think that I could be left on my own, working night shifts and dealing with the stress of the situation. In the end they both stayed, but I would get changed in the hallway, disinfect everything I touched and get straight in the shower when I came home.
My sister and my niece live close to me. It’s been so difficult to go from seeing them three times a week to not at all. But we’re all supporting each other in a different way now, and somehow that has made us closer.
I’m so proud of my job. I think people have always been proud of the NHS, so in a way it’s good that they can express it now on Thursday nights. The workers who are so underpaid - the porters, the kitchen staff, the cleaners - I really hope the government can address their low wages. They are supporting the whole hospital, so I really hope the importance of their roles isn’t forgotten when the pandemic is over.”
London | 06.05.20
Lucy
Honor Grace
When I have felt overwhelmed I have taken walks & watched the sky. Whatever weather. I have a new appreciation for nature & the changing of the seasons ❤️
London | 02.20.21
Honor Grace
Guylee, Mikaela & Shakleton
“2020 was a strange year to be in a new city. I’m grateful for the new people I met (one in particular), and for my dog. Being surrounded by active people and animals was contagious and energising.”
Norway | 03.02.21
Guylee, Mikaela & Shakleton
Bobbi O’Gilvie
"Sad, angry, hopeful. I've had a heavy heart and a full heart. Quarantine has been what it is, my life didn't change tremendously and for that I've been extremely grateful. However, the last few weeks of grief and marching and, once again, having the humanity of black people thrust into the spotlight and debated has been indescribably hard. I want to be out there with my brothers and sisters, and while donation and speaking out and spending money with black businesses is its own form of activism, I'm feeling trapped by quarantine in a way that I hadn't before. But I see us coming together and standing up for ourselves and each other and, man, that's beautiful. I don't think we've ever been more "online" than in this moment so, while we can't all be truly together in this historic moment, I'm thankful that we are privileged enough to witness it.”
Bristol | 06.09.20
Bobbi O’Gilvie
Liam Patel
“Empty kinder wrappers,
You pick 'n' mix my emotions,
A hopeful romantic,
Call me what you will,
You don’t know me yet,
Unsure of how I should and will feel,
I’m still that kid in a sweet shop,
Excited yet indecisive,
To be continued.”
London | 01.13.20
Liam Patel
Nadir Wettsteinn
“Excited for what’s coming and cherishing the moment and its details.”
New York | 04.14.20
Nadir Wettsteinn
Nour Kasem
“I feel somewhat trapped in an uninspiring life. I see beauty in a lot of things. I admire things that people walk past everyday and do not even notice. I tend to associate sounds with spaces, lights with individuals. It's all like a continuous film, meticulously shot and produced. I want to live this film, but reality and responsibilities creep up fast. So I'm trying to bridge both: that 'French cinema' aesthetic and the reality of living and working in a city like London. I don't dislike London, it's a formal city, I am a formal person, it works, but I don't know for how long.”
London | 03.27.20
Nour Kasem
Elisha Khan
“I’m feeling stagnant and I’m yearning for life to move again. This situation makes me feel so trapped.”
London | 03.27.20
Elisha Khan
Esma Kosuta
“I feel that in times like these we should all try our hardest to be the very best version of ourselves. I feel very lucky that Allah has blessed my parents with great health. So i try not to worry too much about them. I will try my hardest to not let these dark times consume my heart and my happiness. I pray that better days will come. This dark time must pass as well.”
Munich | 04.11.20
Esma Kosuta
Sam Furness
“Despite the fact this current situation has severely damaged a lot of projects I’ve worked so hard on - I’m feeling strangely inspired by the huge change in pace and focus. I’ve felt a playful and creatively rebellious spark in me that I haven’t felt in a while. So I’m following that feeling and seeing where it takes me. The world is a confusing place right now, but I’m determined to come out of lockdown knowing that I found some clarity.”
London | 04.05.20
Sam Furness
Joseph Gray
"I'm feeling tangled up & weirded out. No amount of stretching, consuming, playing, listening, running, watching or scribbling serves to sort through how tangled up & weirded out this situation can make us feel. Seeing the incredible versatility, passion, love & application of individuals and communities up & down the land gives me hope. But this is in utter, bollock-naked contrast to the soulless & callous leadership at the core of our country's response. So, I'm feeling tangled up & weirded out; angered up with bearded pout."
London | 05.21.20
Joseph Gray
Nicole Edey
“My mood seems to change every day with uncertainty and I am worried for my business which is currently closed. However, in general I feel calm. I am enjoying having spare time which I haven’t had in years. Having normal life taken away has made me realise how much I take for granted. It makes me appreciate the small things. I find solace in going out on a daily bike ride and eating nostalgic comfort food.”
Herefordshire | 04.11.20
Nicole Edey
Emily Harris
“I feel like the quiet has brought me closer to the passions and people that I love and want to pursue in my life. And I will be taking this forward when normality returns.
I'm super thankful for everyone keeping us safe and healthy and hope that this will rebalance some values in our society that have been out of kilter. ❤️❤️❤️”
London | 04.16.20
Emily Harris
Maiya Coutts
“I'm feeling prone to anger at times, because I'm always prone to anxiety, and irritability is the forgotten part of anxiety. BUT I'm also feeling immensely aware of all the love and connection in my life, for a partner that makes a lot of these days just like the ones you wish you could have on mornings when you're dreading the commute. I feel lucky to have a role in the NHS where I work from home but still feel helpful. I feel SO thankful for the people that are remaining political, daring to say the hard stuff about holding politicians to account and reminding us not to be apathetic or blinded by the chaos. I feel worried and hopeful, and overwhelmed with trying to avoid memories and thoughts about all the things I haven't mentioned...the domestic violence and those hit hardest, without all the privilege I have at this point in my life. But again, lucky for the money I can donate. I don't know. I have a lot of feelings, but I'm fine and quite happy.”
London | 04.23.20
Maiya Coutts
Ali Raine
“I’m in my second foundation year after medical school. At the start, I knew this outbreak was serious, but I don’t think I realised how dramatic and intense it was going to be. One of the hardest things has been communicating with the families of the patients. They can’t visit their sick relative and that is incredibly sad. It’s difficult to try and convey the situation on the phone to them.
My main fear of getting the virus is that I wouldn’t be able to be here to support my colleagues. But I try not to worry too much. My mum is a nurse and my sister is a physio, so they are on the front line as well. I’m more worried about them.
At the end of a shift I feel tired and emotional, but grateful for all the amazing staff here. I wish I could show people how everyone here is working together, going above and beyond. It’s a horrible situation we’re in, but the response of my colleagues makes me proud of the NHS.
I live with two other doctors. It’s nice to have some support and someone who knows what you’re going through. We’ve found the clapping on Thursday nights so moving. It really means a lot to us.”
London | 05.16.20
Ali Raine
Rakaya Fetuga
"Blessed. I've got a lot I'm excited about right now and looking forward to. Even though all my joy feels bittersweet, considering the world. We're marching for black lives, Covid took so many, friends are grieving parents, Yemen is in crisis, tomorrow is World Refugee Day and there's a lot still to fight for and hope for. So making a lot of du'a. But also, I'm getting a cat iA. Can't wait.”
London | 05.19.20
Rakaya Fetuga
Mahera Suhail
“It's been a tough time, and there are a lot of stressors going through my mind. I just want everyone to be happy and healthy.
It's Ramadan right now and this year feels so different. I miss my mosque, I miss my family, I miss my community. Praying keeps me hopeful, I have full trust in my God. I know He has a plan for us all.
Sometimes, when I feel down, I listen to my parents talk, or listen to their sweet laughter, or watch their beautiful faces light up as they smile. And then I'm instantly recharged.
I hope everyone's okay, I'm praying for you. I'm praying for the world.”
Chicago | 05.05.20
Mahera Suhail
Thomas Lewis
"I'm feeling anxious with the economic impact of COVID-19 and its influence on my company's health and my job security. I'm excited to reunite with family and friends, whenever that may be. I recently started running and am enjoying seeing slow but sure improvement and the moment of peacefulness, just concentrating on breathing and keeping moving.”
Newport | 05.11.20
Thomas Lewis
Fariya Faiyaz
“I'm feeling paused, sometimes interrupted, but mostly as if at the starting line. Trying to take it all in.”
London | 04.13.20
Fariya Faiyaz
James Fagan
"I feel like I’m unstuck in time. Even though the beginning of all this upheaval was only a relatively short time ago, the disconnect between life then and life now feels significantly further in the past. Daily routine has become largely indistinguishable between each day, and so time seems like it’s accelerating. That’s no bad thing. The down days don’t last as long and my anxiety about future uncertainties seems lessened because they’ll be resolved sooner (subjectively anyway).”
05.27.20
James Fagan
Sonya Barlow
"I'm feeling challenged and passionate. The last few months have been a roller coaster: from starting a business to societal deconstruction, it's a lot to handle for anyone. At the same time, I'm trying very hard in my own time to go with the flow, to enjoy the moments, to champion other people's voices and to be excited for the future.”
London | 05.22.20
Sonya Barlow
Jamie
“I run a digital marketing agency. I’ve lost a lot of clients due to the pandemic. I started helping out with the charity on April 2nd. I think I’ve done about 22 nights now, I just knew it was important to get out and try and do something positive as there are a lot of people struggling right now.
At the beginning, it was mayhem. People on the streets didn’t even know what the coronavirus was. Half of them are in little alleyways and alcoves where they don’t communicate with anyone. And because no one is around, they can’t beg, they can’t get any food, it’s really scary for them.
There was a big pledge from the government to get all of these people into hostels and hotels. It’s bullsh*t. 80% of them are still out there on the streets. It’s tragic to see people promised something, and then time drags on and nothing happens. They start to lose faith in themselves and in humanity.
So we try and at least get them some food and show them that someone cares about them.
A lot of people in London are standoffish, that’s our way in a big city. But I’ve noticed a lot of warmth during this time. People are coming together to help those in need. My hope is that some constructive change will come from this.”
Jamie is a volunteer with Under One Sky
London | 05.08.20
Jamie
Neelam Keshwala
“How am I feeling? I can’t figure it out. I think I want some time to just be alone and reflect on what’s happening in the world, resist the urge to live in the future all the time and actually just be fully present, in that day and moment.
I kind of had that at the beginning of lockdown but didn’t utilise it as time to have ‘space’. I was trying to plan my future with my work and living situation. Now, I feel like a hamster in a wheel every day and it’s just the next thing. It will probably be like this until retirement unless I just boldly, radically, and unconventionally do things to take time out for myself.
I miss bringing people together in physical spaces and doing events, that usually grounds me.”
London | 08.04.20
Neelam Keshwala
S.M.S
"Reflecting into glass and who is it that I see
My true self? Or what others want me to be?
Mixed feelings, and in some ways thankful
For this chance to pause, it's been quite tranquil
Pondering over what I've been chasing in life
Causing myself pain, is that really right?
Whose dreams am I living, is this my purpose?
Or have I been trapped, an animal in a circus?
Reflecting about the hypocrisy that exists
There's injustice all around, its an endless list
But we post a black square
And we think we're aware
But when this bubble does finally burst
And another person sets off in an early hearse
Will we finally realise that it will never really end
Justice is a lie, why do we even pretend?
Reflecting about how society wants us to be
But this is our world, it's for us see
So let's think about how life's about to unfold
Will it all be the same when we've all turned old?
They say we'll go back to normal, I've forgotten what that is
It's for us to decide, how will we live?”
London | 08.02.2020
S.M.S
Leon Lewis
"Once the fear and overwhelm subsided, more than anything I’m thankful for the opportunity to PAUSE... I’m so used to always being on the go, so this has been an opportunity to step back and assess what is really important.”
London | 08.02.20
Leon Lewis
Al Shaibani
"I'm trying to curb anxiousness with gratitude each day so I swing between the two constantly. But the past few months have showed me who I want to share my gratitude and my anxiety with. It's very telling. I'm also surprised by how much I spend each day just daydreaming.”
London | 06.01.20
Al Shaibani
Quincy Q M
“Jolly”
London | 09.26.20
Quincy Q M
Khalid & Belle
“I was chilled all throughout lockdown, taking it nice and easy, as opposed to having long work hours and long days.
And as for Belle, she’s unsure about it all. She has her ups and downs, there have been perks like working from home and therefore saving money, but she worries about how long it will be for and if it will affect future plans.”
London | 08.31.20
Khalid & Belle
Mr Gee
"Feeling: weary.”
London | 01.13.21
Mr Gee
Tina Grace
"Slowing my breath. Gazing. Letting go. A little more each day... Am I allowing my own canvas to be revealed? Wiped clean of baggage, learning not to control outcomes. Learning to trust. To breathe **** ”
01.19.21
Tina Grace
Shreya Bhardwaj
"I always wanted to get this haircut, but I was being hesitant because of my parents and brother. I wanted a major transformation in my looks and I wanted to feel differently. So, finally, I thought I'd get it done on 31st December 2020 and have a brand new start to 2021. But I couldn’t get it done. On 7th January, I finally got it done and I was amazed by the outcome as it looked DOPE AF. I feel very confident, savage, hot, and more myself in this new hairstyle. I feel very, very happy and different from inside, and it shows outside. “New Year, New Me” took some time, but it did happen, and this time I got that “New Me” feeling 🙃”
India | 01.13.21
Shreya Bhardwaj
Renee
“We’re not going away. We simply refuse to accept this racism any longer. Our generation will be the ones to stop this. You stood with us in Hyde Park on Wednesday. You stood with us in Parliament Square yesterday. And now you’re here with us again. You can tell everyone that we have protested peacefully, but with great strength and solidarity. And we won’t stop until our human rights are respected.”
Parliament Square London | 06.10.20
Renee
Jessica Tweed
"Well my physical life is more neat and tidy, considered and compartmentalised, than ever before. But my brain has been on a real ride these last two months. Is it possible to feel like you know yourself more and less at the same time, thanks to a pandemic?”
05.28.20
Jessica Tweed
Mubarak Elmubarak
“I’ve had time to reconnect with people who are important to me, and the luxury to occasionally disconnect from the world. I’ve taken stock and I’m grateful.”
02.08.21
Mubarak Elmubarak
Isabel Dobinson
I've learnt to be at home with myself.
I've wallowed in dark moments fuelled by loneliness and insecurity. But, in confronting these painful feelings, I've started to accept who I am and embrace my worth.
It's been tough, but I'm grateful for the opportunity to finally meet me and realise my light should never dim for someone else.
Ps - I have a long way to go but it's a start!
London | 02.20.21
Isabel Dobinson
Tawfik
Lockdown was the loneliest and hardest time of my life. In March, I lost work and my house. The hardest part was Ramadan. I've never celebrated Ramadan alone, but as I have no family in the UK, and with the inability to travel, it had to be that way.
London | 03.16.21
Tawfik
Jules Chain
“Right now I feel like I’m floating in a swimming pool. You know when you have that ten seconds of silence inside water and the world feels like it’s in the blur of all the ripples? I feel like that with a lot of things in my life right now.”
London | 01.18.20
Jules Chan
Saima Khalid
“I'm doing okay sometimes, other times not okay. It fluctuates so much throughout the day. But I'm grateful that I am safe right now in this moment 💛”
London | 04.16.20
Saima Khalid
Jai Patel
“I’m pretty bored, getting used to lockdown but it’s taken a while. Thought it would be worse but it turns out there are millions of things I can procrastinate with at home. Now getting worried that I’m going to struggle to adjust back to normal work...”
London | 03.28.20
Jai Patel
Jessica Spencer-Keyse
”Feeling the swings of moods and time. Grateful for the warmth radiating through love & connection at this time. Here’s to hoping we find new ways to weather the stormiest storms together, to bask in the sunlight again.“
London | 04.05.20
Jessica Spencer-Keyse
Paolo Pascolo
“Feeling great!”
London | 03.25.20
Paolo Pascolo
Zainab Khan
“I’m exhausted. From being indoors and seeing the same rooms. I’m grateful that I have a safe home, family, and a job in this time. But it doesn’t take away from the exhaustion I feel. The first few weeks were the hardest - finding the energy to get out of bed and face the day - was non-existent. After all, it was just another day at the desk, on the couch, at the dining table. It took work to reframe my outlook. I understood the importance of staying in and wouldn’t have it any other way now. But I do miss the potential of tomorrow - something I am scared to think of sometimes, most times.”
London | 05.14.20
Zainab Khan
Sara Thabeth
“I’m feeling a little lost, exacerbated by our current situation. Not sure where I‘m going or what’s to come. But I am hopeful, I am thankful and I am grateful.”
Dublin | 04.02.20
Sara Thabeth
Saad S
“I’m feeling gloomy and terroristy (no haircut cause of quarantine) 😂”
London | 07.17.20
Saad S
Fatima Kosuta
“Stressed. I cannot tell you why, but stress somehow became a constant in my life. I am still trying to figure out how to get rid of these mountains that piled up upon my shoulders. Time became an enemy. Somewhere I read a saying that goes like this: “going even slower when feeling the pressure to rush.” I really like this one. Slow down. Breathe. It’s alright.”
Munich | 05.03.20
Fatima Kosuta
Farah Shahab-Din-Chaudry
“Trying to keep myself entertained. Sometimes, mostly, I'm positive, sometimes bored, others creative. Mix of emotions.”
London | 05.15.20
Farah Shahab-Din-Chaudry
Sai Pankaj
"Feeling good, happy 😇”
Hyderabad, India | 04.30.20
Sai Pankaj
Micheal Newton
"🤔 I’m feeling happy, because Covid has allowed me to stop, take a breather, resettle my mind and have more time to think. ’Meh’, because, sometimes, life and news can be overwhelming, and that’s the only way to describe that feeling. And tired, because of the activism, daily work of projects, keeping up with life and socialising.”
London | 06.10.20
Micheal Newton
Ikam Eterravan
"I came back to the island from a year of sojourn in Cambodia and Vietnam when I found out that my grandmother passed away. I took the flight back on the 1st of January, before the lockdown. First, the passing of a loved one and then a volcanic eruption, so I remained on the island. A few weeks after a lockdown was implemented due to the Covid-19 pandemic, I was stuck on the island worrying about supplies and how to earn while being in isolation. I wasn't prepared for this as I needed to re-establish the food garden, which takes time, since I was away for a long time. It was really difficult in the beginning, as I was also running out of medications for my mental disability (Borderline Personality and major depressive disorders), and there's no way to procure them on the island as mental health doesn't really exist here. There's no transportation in and out of the island, and barely anyone I can speak with as I live in semi-isolation.
I started reaching out to a few people, and most of them helped by listening and checking on me from time to time. I feel lucky and glad to have friends from everywhere, and then, furthermore, I realised that I am surrounded by nature, a place where I can do gardening and art. For the past few days I've been repairing the house, meditating, painting, swimming and gardening, and doing these things helps me cope with the crazy times. So far, my feelings have been very stable, more appreciative and calm.”
Romblon, Philippines | 06.24.20
Ikam Eterravan
Lucinda Hansen
"I feel a bit uneasy right now. It’s like I’m in limbo. Everything is the same but so different.”
London | 05.22.20
Lucinda Hansen
Mohammed Kazzam
"I am tired of connecting with people exclusively through fibre optics.”
London | 05.01.20
Mohammed Kazzam
Tutku Barbaros
"I feel like every inch of me is full of emotion and every one of those emotions is operating full blast? Gratitude, rage, love, fear, joy, all of them are all systems go.
I feel hope. I hope I hope I hope this will galvanise us towards a totally different way of life. Towards equality, compassion, sustainability. So, of course, at the same time, I feel sick with fear. Fear that people will forget, will return to the status quo, decide everything was handled fine and slip back into habit. And then I get the rage. AND THEN I remember all the brilliant minds around me, the communities forming and the consciousness rising.
I feel faith? I feel sort of cosmic? I swear, sometimes, I can feel the newly clear waters of our finally recovering oceans rushing to my head? The same head my mum (a hairdresser) has been faffing about with all day because she's missing work ,so we're playing salons again, which is nice. And that makes me feel so very aware of the privileges I have. And then, of course, the privileges others don't - so, in comes the feelings of rage, sadness, and the unrelenting need for change. And finally, again, I feel myself back to hope.”
London | 05.08.20
Tutku Barbaros
Jason Brown
"I feel both pressured and relieved. Not needing to go anywhere, and so wanting to express myself fully again. Whatever that means! ‘Fully’ is my enemy, since it’s a measure of 'how much', which I don’t need. Peace is possible...🙂”
London | 05.28.20
Jason Brown
Amrit
"The Punjab is an institution. My family have been serving London for almost three quarters of a century and I thought, no matter what, we’ll keep the engine running to serve those in need. And so the moment we closed, we turned into a very small takeaway.
Being managing director of the family business before the outbreak, I had a very cushy life. 99% of my staff are now on furlough, the remaining 1% are with me now, and we’re cooking every day. It’s humbling to see the volunteers outside who are distributing the food every night. I just knew the Punjab had to play a part. I’m so proud of my team and my colleagues.
I provide about 250 meals for a charity that serves the homeless on a weekly basis. When lockdown came, I put the word out to say I’m ready, the Punjab is ready. We’re lucky that we have a small team upstairs and I’ve got stock - and also lots of great friends who are providing donations of food. So, it made sense to continue that work on a bigger scale.
In my faith, Sikhism, there is a key concept of a warrior saint. It’s about helping the needy, the vulnerable, the oppressed, and standing up for justice. It was quite shocking to see the number of homeless rising straight after the lockdown, despite the attempts by the authorities to put them in shelters. So, from 250 meals a week, we are now doing 2,500 a week.
I had a staff of 45, with a bustling restaurant every night and queues outside. But I’ve tried to stay positive and optimistic. I’m a fourth generation British Sikh. This is my country, this is my homeland. I’m so proud of London, so proud of key workers, everyone is coming together to help. It’s only right for us to do our part and provide for those who are struggling."
London | 06.18.20
Amrit
Joe Ruijs
"I feel like an idiot. Which is a feeling I’ve been trying to shake off for a while now... pfff... Anyway, whilst on my morning run, I had a chance to stop and say hello to someone. Someone who I’ve seen about briefly from time to time... and she really is beautiful.
However, my overwhelming, painfully awkward anxiety kicked in and I totally bottled it. But, whether or not I would have had a chance to get to know her properly (she’s way out of my league)... I just wish I wasn’t such an idiot.”
Newport | 07.17.20
Joe Ruijs
Marcus Flemmings
"Lockdown had me in different shades of emotions; from pensive, to unbeatable; to vulnerable; to optimistic. All roads lead to boredom. But I fear not, because from this I have learnt who I am. A question that eluded me for so long. An answer I dared not even conceive. Now, all makes sense.”
London | 10.01.20
Marcus Flemmings
Amani Saeed
"I’m feeling disconnected and aimless. Like there is nothing to look forward to, which forces me to pay attention to each moment as I am in it, rather than focusing on the next thing.”
London | 10.10.20
Amani Saeed
Diego Torres-Cantú
"This pandemic has completely changed the way I see myself. As a musician, these have not been the easiest months. No concerts, few rehearsals and most of the tours planned for the year are now a great memory that never happened.
But one thing did happen: I found myself questioning my views on art, music, and it’s meaning. I started seeing the bigger picture, trying not to focus only on what the mirror shows me. It's been a difficult process: lots of trying and failing and some terrible days. But in these introspective times I have stepped out of my comfort zone and really made an effort to be creative. Creativity gives me freedom, the same freedom we lost during lockdown.”
London | 09.24.20
Diego Torres-Cantú
Mariam Hussein
"Feeling mild 🤷🏻”
London | 09.24.20
Mariam Hussein
Tsedenia Skitch
"I’m feeling calm, happy, reflective. Lockdown has forced me to slow down which I think I was scared of; what if I’m not doing enough? What if I’m wasting time? But, actually, I’m quite enjoying it. I took some time away from the city, got some fresh air, connected with myself and nature and I’m feeling pretty refreshed and thankful for this time. Thankful for the good health of my loved ones. Thankful for the reminder that it’s okay to slow down. It hasn’t all been easy, don’t get me wrong, but it was useful for me to work through that to showcase to myself how much resilience, growth and strength I have.”
London | 07.23.20
Tsedenia Skitch
Jason Chin
“They truly have us. The separatism of our kind, more than ever, I believe, is now economic. We are more alike, despite our physical and cultural differences. Each and every one of us practises self preservation, which means, innately, we are out for us and our own. These financial pursuits dictate our time, behaviour and social rankings. Such separatism is also exasperated by our silence of struggle and magnification of success. By doing this, we create more distance than connectivity, we’re less relatable to outsiders the more we deify ourselves. Humility is what binds us, ego is what faults us. We are tenants of the earth who act like the masters of it.”
London | 01.15.21
Jason Chin
Gerard Gyedu
I feel very content. Very good. I couldn’t say I felt like this five months ago or so, but better times are just around the corner.
London | 10.03.20
Gerard Gyedu
Charanprite Dhami
“I am feeling happy, l achieved so many firsts in lockdown. I wrote my first screenplay, ran my first 5K, and now l'm relaxing, as l gave something back to the key workers. I learned the art of gratitude and service during lockdown. l turned the negative into the positive. It hasn’t been all sunshine and rainbows 🌈 , they always come after the rain! Stay safe.”
West Yorkshire | 01.13.21
Charanprite Dhami
Tunde Abdulazeez
"When I took this I think the feeling was and is still Introspection.”
London | 11.27.20
Tunde Abdulazeez
Ali Montazeriha
I simply feel determined!
Belgium | 02.07.21
Ali Montazeriha
Jasneil Panesar
“Helping out my family business a few years ago has morphed into work encapsulating all my daily energy, at the cost of every other aspect of my life. I’ve withdrawn from my partner, family and friends. If I work I feel guilty for not socialising and if I ever socialise I feel even guiltier for not working. I feel I’m slowly sinking in a rough sea, striving for some calm in chaos.”
London | 02.15.2021
Jasneil Panesar
Ren Adzska
Navigating this woeful new landscape as the average person is stressful enough, but as an artist? That is a different beast entirely. If opportunities weren’t granted sparsely already, coming across them during a lockdown was like finding a black cat in a coal mine. Despite this, I collaborated with artists abroad (thanks Zoom), shot editorials, found my sound as a musician, and even modelled for Nike. Compensating for the new, uncharitable circumstances required a creative determination I had no inkling I possessed; almost necessitated it. It’s an ethic that I intend to practice long after the pandemic is behind us.
From struggle comes strength.
Toronto | 02.22.21
Ren Adzska
Christopher Lo
We work together and have, this week, returned to the office. Before Monday, 'fatigued', 'uninspired', 'fed up' were reoccurring words on our FaceTime and Zoom catch ups... after one day of working together we had a breakthrough on a project we’ve been struggling on for a while. Now, we feel hopeful.
London | 03.31.21
Christopher Lo
Johnny
“Honestly, I’ve got a banging headache. Spiritually I feel balanced. Physically I feel pain. And emotionally I feel sensitive.”
London | 01.29.20
Johnny
Jessica Osunde
“Trying to hold on to internal peace and harmony, not only for myself, but for the ones closest to me. Best trusting in the most high that he never fails me”
London | 03.25.20
Jessica Osunde
Edi Whitehead
“The short is: "To quote Donkey from Shrek, "I think I need a hug!""
The long is: "I'm feeling complicated! On one hand, I'm carrying a huge amount of rage and despair - and I don't have my usual spaces to channel and use that. On the other... I'm in love. And I don't think I've found the words to adequately describe that feeling yet. Not ideal timing, to fall blissfully for someone just before a nationwide lockdown, but I'm letting part of me indulge in the feeling of excitement that comes from thinking about what it could become."
London | 04.17.20
Edi Whitehead
David Medina
“Need to drink my coffee.”
Brooklyn | 03.25.20
David Medina
Franzi Klein
“I went from being anxious about the uncertainty of the situation we’re in, to accepting that there is nothing I can do. I’m starting to settle into my routine in isolation and I have to admit that slowing down feels good.
It helps to know that we’re all in this together.
Obviously it’s a hugely tragic situation on a global scale and my heart breaks for everyone who has lost someone or is suffering.
I also think, as individuals, we should still try and make the best out of our individual situations and do what we can to soothe ourselves and others. And not feel guilty if we end up turning those moments of calmness into something positive. Guilt doesn’t help anyone right now.”
London | 04.18.20
Franzi Klein
Simone Furlani
"The living room looks like an office, even 3 weeks after we’ve moved in this new flat. The downside is being stuck “at” work for longer hours. It’s just harder to disconnect, and somehow the workload increased. But I just got my home-made haircut, and overall, I’m feeling pretty good. My family in Italy is having a way tougher time than me.”
London | 04.20.20
Simone Furlani
Dani Owen
“I miss you.”
Essex | 04.12.20
Dani Owen
Martina Huzell
“I’m doing good. We are lucky in Sweden to not be in complete lockdown, but it’s so strange to be in the middle of a massive world crisis and simultaneously having a somewhat normal life that isn’t quite normal? Hahah I can’t even put it into words. It’s just massively mindfucking and anxiety inducing. I’m lucky to still have my job and that my family is healthy now after a corona scare.
And now I've got performance anxiety just about taking this selfie, but here I am at my home work station feeling both super unmotivated and super anxious to be doing a good job.”
Sweden | 04.15.20
Martina Huzell
Isra Hassan
Grateful for today and hopeful for tomorrow. Taking each day with a little more patience and humility. Over the last few weeks I’ve worked with exceptional colleagues, I’ve seen beautifully brave patients, along with their families and friends, unfortunately not all have won their battles. Where I would normally hold your hand or give you a hug during these unimaginable times I’m unable to do so. I’ve learnt so many lessons from each of you. After hardship does come ease, so I look forward to the cwtches, coffee and cake once this is over. 🌈💕”
London | 04.18.20
Isra Hassan
Samarth Patel
“I’m feeling pretty good right now, actually. I haven’t felt like I’ve had the chance to cook, read, and generally feel like I’ve slowed down in a very long time. But I can’t help but feel guilty a lot of the time, and I miss seeing people. We weren’t designed for social distancing.”
London | 05.27.20
Samarth Patel
Kristina Soteri
“I’m feeling restless but hopeful. I put on this sweater I bought right before all this happened, I was excited to wear it, but since being on lockdown I haven’t worn one piece of real clothing and started to feel not myself. So I put on this sweater to feel some sense of normalcy/excitement.”
New York | 4.11.20
Kristina Soteri
Johnathan Urquijo
"When life gives you lemons, just say 'fuck the lemons' and bail."
Brooklyn | 04.29.20
Johnathan Urquijo
Nigel Edwards
"Life is hard, life is good. So much to say, even more to feel. Until then, who takes care of us?”
Toronto | 06.04.20
Nigel Edwards
Shi
"I’m feeling so claustrophobic! I was travelling when Covid hit and had nowhere to live, so moved into my sister's studio that I can have from 8.30pm - 8.00am. It’s then used as a work space. The rest of the day, I’m in the house home-schooling my nieces. It’s killing me!!!
Haha so yeah that’s my emotion right now. I wanna get out! Trapped/claustrophobic.”
05.22.20
Shi
Doïna Cressevich
"The way I feel today is totally different from how I felt that day when you first asked. I remember feeling quite peaceful, believed in myself a lot and in my dreams. Today I am feeling quite sad with the reminder of police brutality. I am angry to be honest, not sure which one you want to put but yeah, pretty different!!”
Cambridge | 05.13.2020
Doïna Cressevich
Hafiza Patel
"So this is how I’m feeling... kinda stagnant and waiting for life to kickstart. Do I make my own destiny or is kismet already written? Do I wait for others to make decisions for me or do I decide? One question just leads to another… ”
London | 05.10.20
Hafiza Patel
Di’mond Qai Sharma-Joseph
"Currently I’m feeling quite guilty. I feel guilty that I haven’t been as productive as I could have been, but more so I feel guilty that I’ve become exhausted by digital interaction. The constant calls, texts, videos etc. have become exhausting - I love the people in my life, but the screen and the consistency of needing to be in communication with everyone has made me feel a lot weaker, both physically and mentally. Despite this, there is a part of me that is relieved, relieved that my family are safe and doing well. But this also comes with guilt...why should I feel relieved when so many others have lost their lives? It’s a tricky moment in time and there are a million feelings a second, all of them contradicting each other.”
05.14.20
Di’mond Qai Sharma-Joseph
Brian
"People on the street are used to being let down. The long-term homeless are used to having to eke out an existence on whatever crumbs they can find. I’ve had hundreds of conversations with them over the last few weeks. They are really struggling with missing their routine. Even if you are homeless, you have a routine. You know when a shop opens and someone might give you a cup of tea or a sandwich, or the guy who always walks past and says hello.
I’ve been volunteering with Under One Sky since 2015. We’re about building up relationships with people on the street. To show them compassion, to sit and talk with them. To help them get documentation with local authorities, to help them get a phone, to put our arms around them and listen to them. To help them get some warm clothes, help them with Universal Credit.
I’ve been out distributing food and supplies almost every day for the last month. I’ve not really had time to sit and think about the depth of the crisis.
We’ve met so many people in the last few weeks who have been forced into living on the streets, people who have lost their jobs in the hospitality and service sector. It’s so tough for them. They’re not used to the trauma of this life.
I’m a Buddhist. My faith is crucial in driving me to take on this work. It’s made me realise that life is not about me, it’s about helping others. We always say, if not us then who?“
Brian is a father of three and a volunteer with Under One Sky.
London | 05.08.20
Brian
Dom & Matt
“Locked away and scheming for a better future."
London | 04.17.20
Dom & Matt
Ellie Moore
“Ask me that question and you’d probably get a different answer day to day. For someone who likes to feel in control, uncertainty isn’t my forte. I’m definitely learning to be more patient during this time - just accepting that I can’t organise or fix my way out of this particular shitstorm!
London | 09.25.20
Ellie Moore
Ali Ibrahim
“Get used to a tough life, for luxury does not last forever.”
London | 04.29.20
Ali Ibrahim
Lucy Kerrigan
"I’ve been jolted by the injustice of Donald Trump appointing Amy Coney Barrett which, in and of itself, is an anti-choice move.
I went through a surgical abortion just before lockdown. I didn’t tell anybody until now. I supressed a lot of emotions because I didn’t want my now ex-boyfriend to think I was being difficult during a global pandemic, but the truth is, I don’t think I really dealt with the emotions that came with a surgical abortion, until now.
It makes me so sad to think that the choice could be taken away from American women. Women just like me.
I’m trying hard not to follow the news anymore, but it’s hard. I don’t want to be appear ignorant, but I don’t want to keep making myself depressed.”
London | 09.26.20
Lucy Kerrigan
Luka Rocyn
“For me, moving into unprecedented territory has allowed me to realign what I want.
My primary focus is my growth and my vitality as a being.... with refined, nicely concluded work as a by-product.
It’s taken my entire adult life to deduce.
I now work smart and refuse to work hard.
Self-seeking or sensible?"
Machen | 07.12.20
Luka Rocyn
Jason & Ava Brown
"\the secret/
the secret is yours
that right rope
is a tight rope
made
told through you
and one truth of many truths
for there are many truths
it’s often an old story
told
effortless being
takes no conscious energy to maintain
deliberate doing
all thinking
more cadence
one stillness
the other staccato
one of my secrets, this is
not either or
rather
and both”
London | 05.28.20
Jason & Ava Brown
Dean Delandro
"During this difficult time, I have found great beauty in the simple things in life. When we study the complexities of the universe, planets, earth, oceans, continents, rainforests, deserts, plants, animals, humans, organs, cells and thoughts, it gives me great reference to my humble existence. The opportunity to interact with this creation gives me great joy. Even if it’s just sat contemplating the marvellous and intimate beauty of it all, and how it co-exists to create our present experience. Understanding this, and watching humans change the world's landscape to make life easier with less interaction, makes me worried about the future ecosystem.
I see it as this - the grand creator presenting us with a beautiful and perfect painting, but over time we add to it, deciding we can improve it. Over that time, we add to it so much, that it’s eventually unrecognisable.
“It’s time to restore the original.”
London | 10.30.20
Dean Delandro
Tina Pasotra
Today I'm feeling content 💕
Cardiff | 01.14.21
Tina Pasotra
Thu Nguyen and Kamala
I feel loved... The Lockdown has helped me understand what's important and what's noise. And I get to spend a lot of time with this fluffy ball of unconditional love (named her Kamala Harris).
Toronto | 01.19.21
Thu Nguyen and Kamala
Chanel Dehond
"Feeling humanity. Feeling human. Waking up every morning excited to meet people, hear their stories, leave them feeling a little more heard, or having left our conversation feeling good about themselves and their decisions. I recognize that I'm a person with a "life jacket" and "a boat" and "the ability to swim" - that I have more than enough to keep me afloat. I hope to give some of that extra positivity away; meet people who have a different experience, hear them, hope that they leave the conversation with a smile, a little happier or feeling good about themselves, because they're amazing!”
New York | 11.26.20
Chanel Dehond
Sarah Downes
"Feeling all over the place! I’m not well with Covid at the moment so not feeling myself.”
Kent | 01.14.21
Sarah Downes
Tom Clarkson
“I had a sort of selfish relief when I heard lockdown would continue.
Often, the relentlessness of being a freelancer can be overwhelming for me, and I started to recognise a strange anxiety I feel when things flirt with going back to ‘normal’.
But this third lockdown has been a struggle. A cocktail of cabin fever and January blues.
When I feel down, I facetime my niece, Alba. She took this picture last time we spoke.
Chatting to her keeps me going... that, and the distant promise that I’ll be able to hug my mum again soon!”
London | 02.15.21
Tom Clarkson
Eve Atkinson
“Your future self is watching you right now through your memories”
I feel like this is kinda what I've been experiencing this past year. This time will be recorded in history books, so it feels like so much has happened. But we’ve also been inside for most of it so, on a personal scale, not that much has... Either way, I feel like it’s been formative for me.
Being out in the world kind of dilutes the inner experience of self. Which isn't a bad thing, but the past year of lockdown feels like a very privately experienced and intimate time, in which I've been introduced to so many aspects of the being I am and what makes me feel alive when there are no external means of defining myself. You wake up to yourself and you meet yourself in bed again at night. You get a very concentrated idea of who you really are.
Over the year, I've felt moved by such subtle, ordinary moments, that I’ve gained even more reverence for the simple things in life, and for myself. I think I’ll look back on this time as one of reckoning, and an acceleration of my friendship and love story with my spirit, my body, my mind."
London | 02.26.21
Eve Atkinson
Jeveria Raja
" This was taken on a night shift. I’d been away for a week and had heard a few of our patients had been doing a lot better, so I was feeling more hopeful than I had in a while. ”
05.14.20
Jeveria Raja